5.02.2004
Fulfilling Frustrations
I never realized the depth of my frustration as a fifth grader until I finally found my niche at church. When I was attending Mound Park Elementary School we used to watch movies from time to time. You know the kind - 8 mm reel-to-reel movies that were usually black & white and had to be threaded through an old style movie projector. These projectors were somewhat complex and required a level of technical expertise that seemed to be beyond many elementary school teachers. So what did they do? They found a bright, technically adept youngster to thread the projector, load the reels and jog the machine whenever the film would get off track. These were usually young man and had the unofficial title of Projector Boy.
And I was never one of them.
Disappointment filled my little heart every time I was passed over for Projector Boy as others who were better students than me were selected. It wasn't until later in life as a lab technician where I would while away my days playing with technical gadgetry that I understood the source of my frustration. All I knew at the time was that I wanted desperately to be the Projector Boy and never once had that deep longing of fulfilled.
When I was in college learning to be a teacher there was a workshop we were required to attend. It was on multimedia usage in the classroom and we all had to demonstrate proficiency at all the tools teachers had at their disposal. It was almost like being in heaven. I say almost, because as soon as we showed the professor that we knew how to use the filmstrip projector, the cassette player with multiple headphones, the overhead projector, the opaque projector and of course my favorite, the 8 mm film projector, we were rushed on to the next piece of equipment. I had no difficulty operating any of it and was ushered from the room so the students who were going into elementary education could get more practice time. Us high school science teachers in the making were not allowed to do what we wanted to do most - play with the equipment.
Sadly, I entered the teaching profession at the cusp of a revolution in education. Filmstrips and slide projectors were going the way of the dinosaur and I never once in my professional career had a chance to use the piece of equipment I loved the most - the film projector. Everything was now VHS tape and involved simply wheeling the television cart into the room, putting in the tape and hitting "Play." Where was the technical savvy in that? I never had the opportunity in my five years of teaching school to redeem myself or relieve my frustration.
As time went by and I went from science teacher to scientist to adult educator, there was a transformation occurring in the realm of multimedia presentations. With the rise of powerful presentation-ready laptop computers and compact projection systems, PowerPoint provided a way for me to redeem myself. I adopted the new technology with abandon and found myself transported into techno-geek paradise as I hooked up wires and cables and network connections, booted up systems and ran diagnostics. I adjusted keystones, color and white balance to my heart's content. I had arrived. I had found my niche. I was in the ultimate Projector Boy heaven.
But God had plans for my frustrations. When the church purchased a projection system and a computer, they also needed someone to run it. The choir director approached me with an offer that I could not turn down. So now, a frustrated fifth grader has gone to Church Projector Boy where I use my skills far more than I dreamed. The Lord is merciful in fulfilling my desire on a weekly basis as I turn my talents to His service.
Now this may sound trivial to some but for me it only highlights the attention that our God pays to details and seeming petty concerns. Who would have thought that the Sovereign Creator of the Universe would pay the slightest attention to the angst of an elementary school urchin? But the same God who takes the utmost care in crafting subtle beauty in a dandelion that gets mowed down on Saturday morning also cares for the delicate tracery in our souls. And the very things that start as tiny torments, He can redeem for His own as a way to minister to His church.
I never realized the depth of my frustration as a fifth grader until I finally found my niche at church. When I was attending Mound Park Elementary School we used to watch movies from time to time. You know the kind - 8 mm reel-to-reel movies that were usually black & white and had to be threaded through an old style movie projector. These projectors were somewhat complex and required a level of technical expertise that seemed to be beyond many elementary school teachers. So what did they do? They found a bright, technically adept youngster to thread the projector, load the reels and jog the machine whenever the film would get off track. These were usually young man and had the unofficial title of Projector Boy.
And I was never one of them.
Disappointment filled my little heart every time I was passed over for Projector Boy as others who were better students than me were selected. It wasn't until later in life as a lab technician where I would while away my days playing with technical gadgetry that I understood the source of my frustration. All I knew at the time was that I wanted desperately to be the Projector Boy and never once had that deep longing of fulfilled.
When I was in college learning to be a teacher there was a workshop we were required to attend. It was on multimedia usage in the classroom and we all had to demonstrate proficiency at all the tools teachers had at their disposal. It was almost like being in heaven. I say almost, because as soon as we showed the professor that we knew how to use the filmstrip projector, the cassette player with multiple headphones, the overhead projector, the opaque projector and of course my favorite, the 8 mm film projector, we were rushed on to the next piece of equipment. I had no difficulty operating any of it and was ushered from the room so the students who were going into elementary education could get more practice time. Us high school science teachers in the making were not allowed to do what we wanted to do most - play with the equipment.
Sadly, I entered the teaching profession at the cusp of a revolution in education. Filmstrips and slide projectors were going the way of the dinosaur and I never once in my professional career had a chance to use the piece of equipment I loved the most - the film projector. Everything was now VHS tape and involved simply wheeling the television cart into the room, putting in the tape and hitting "Play." Where was the technical savvy in that? I never had the opportunity in my five years of teaching school to redeem myself or relieve my frustration.
As time went by and I went from science teacher to scientist to adult educator, there was a transformation occurring in the realm of multimedia presentations. With the rise of powerful presentation-ready laptop computers and compact projection systems, PowerPoint provided a way for me to redeem myself. I adopted the new technology with abandon and found myself transported into techno-geek paradise as I hooked up wires and cables and network connections, booted up systems and ran diagnostics. I adjusted keystones, color and white balance to my heart's content. I had arrived. I had found my niche. I was in the ultimate Projector Boy heaven.
But God had plans for my frustrations. When the church purchased a projection system and a computer, they also needed someone to run it. The choir director approached me with an offer that I could not turn down. So now, a frustrated fifth grader has gone to Church Projector Boy where I use my skills far more than I dreamed. The Lord is merciful in fulfilling my desire on a weekly basis as I turn my talents to His service.
Now this may sound trivial to some but for me it only highlights the attention that our God pays to details and seeming petty concerns. Who would have thought that the Sovereign Creator of the Universe would pay the slightest attention to the angst of an elementary school urchin? But the same God who takes the utmost care in crafting subtle beauty in a dandelion that gets mowed down on Saturday morning also cares for the delicate tracery in our souls. And the very things that start as tiny torments, He can redeem for His own as a way to minister to His church.
